2005年1月26日 下午9點03分19秒I frequently ask myself whether if i'm happy...

I frequently ask myself whether if i'm happy with the current status of my life.

• literally 12 hours wokring in the studio everyday
• at least two projects due every week
• unable to obtain a  job due to lack of time
• Must obtain 6 - 8 hours of sleep per day
• no energy or time to be depressed
• unable to slack off because of such packed schedule

So. there're goods and bads.  When time like this, i wished i could stay home and be a bump all day long. However when i am able to do so, i would have something else to complain about. In life we constantly asking for more, until it gets to a point where we mentally and physically are not able to handle. Are we indeed fighting against the tasks that get in our way? Or are we only fighting against ourselves? I want a better future for myself, so I deal with the responsibilities that school mgiht being upon. YOU want to pay off  your car, so YOU work 7 days a week. HE wants win her heart, so HE trys to do everything that she wants. If we have no desire, we would perhaps in a less stressful situation than where we're at now. Unfortunately at the same time there will be no improvement ever if we want nothing more for ourselves. We often wear ourselves down. We drained every bit of energy and hope out of us, before we finally give it a rest, take a break, and after a while we continue to fight our own battle again.

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2005年1月17日 下午3點22分58秒Please. Love me. Cherish me. and only me.

Please.

Love me. Cherish me.

and only me.

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2004年12月18日 上午1點26分08秒Today's note: * Lying on the bed watching TV...

Today's note:

* Lying on the bed watching TV all day, enjoying all the junk i could possibly stuff into my stomach.

* It's lonely being by yourself all day, but i love it. I love just being a lazy bump doing absolutely nothing productive.... ...

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