2004年5月30日 下午1點10分00秒

so tired, so damn tired, fuckin tired

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2004年5月29日 下午2點16分00秒

june 11-15: barcelona and madrid, SPAIN

june 21-26: rome and venice, ITALY

june 29-july 2: brussels, bruges and antwerp, BELGIUM

starting july: luxembourg, GERMANY (frankfurt n berlin), POLAND (warsaw and old town), SLOVAKIA (capital n high tartras:mountain region), HUNGARY (budapest) and AUSTRIA revisited (tis time to salzburg)

july 22: south italy?

but i wanna go to turkey soooo much...perhaps should better wait it next year...

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2004年5月29日 上午5點49分00秒

shopping in monoprix,

picnic under tour eiffel,

chocolate cereal prepared,

afternoon stroll in food market,

what more can i ask for?

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2004年5月27日 上午5點08分00秒

feel so damn bad when ya cant get an intership

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2004年5月24日 下午1點45分00秒

feel detach from others again, even to ppl closest to ya

ya're n ya're not in their lives

ya try to get involved and seems...it works, but ppl dun like tis way..

ends up..doesnt work at all...

jst when i try tell my sis how to do better in exams/interviews n stuff, again, she says that i'm so mean, so harsh, so picky, thas what my friends tell me...very harsh to myself

the thing is, i hav put up standards for myself to achieve, a difficult goal to reach, to aim high, cos i know i can be sth better than tis

i dun hav any expectations on ppl,  on my frds, or even my parents, i dun expect any of them to live up to my way, i'm happy to hav them jst as what they are and who they are, but not what they can become

but tis certainly different for my sis, i can spell it out loud that i always hav certain kind of expectations on her, i wanna her do better than what she has now, cos i know, if she tries out n pushes a bit hard for herself, she can be jst, better

at least, from my view, i know it's not the way my sis feels, perhaps

it's fine for her to be tis, but as i'm confident bout my sis that she can be better, i really end up real harsh n very picky for her, real mean, then most of the time, ends up my sis feel real bad bout tis

i know how ya feel gal, i know it's never easy n actually very hard to listen or jst read my words, hmm...but i guess i will keep talkin like tis ga la..the thing is ya can really choose not to listen, at least after bullshitting, i feel like i hav done my part...

no matter what, no matter what ya become, i jst luv ya as who you are

cheer up gal

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