網誌
2003年11月29日 上午7點13分00秒our reality is like this: the most...
our reality is like this: the most intelligent thing is curiosity, while it is also the stupidest...
stupid in the sense.. depression grows with more discoveries. and i should haf knew it before i let my curiosity seduce me.
2003年11月27日 上午5點48分00秒i don't belong to here.. and i dunno i...
i don't belong to here..
and i dunno i belong to where...
2003年11月26日 下午3點29分00秒it's about time to sleep... real tired......
it's about time to sleep... real tired... but still wanna stay on... for no reason.
today's a pretty good day.. i lunched with mr siu.. it's always comfortable chatting with him.. nothing reallie about marks and grades.. just some tiny things happening here and there.. related, or not related to myself.. and i got my reference report for him to fill in for my jupas stuff.. i got my a-level cert back too.. i feel nothing when i face my cert again.. well.. does it mean i lose the motivation to carry on..? or is it the best without feeling too pressurized..? whatever..
i hang around in those fabric shops for the whole afternoon.. learnt pretty much.. stole + took so many samples.. *real lucky..* and i met a new people too... starting to get addicted to moon gay tong shiu..
as a fashion designer, i follow trends.. but i can never create a trend that belongs to myself. i can only retain my own style under the big fashion trend. suddenly realize, probably this's the reason why i wanna be an architect so much.. i'm aggressive, and i want my own thing.
2003年11月25日 上午5點14分00秒[IMAGE] Currently Playing Me Against the...
 | Currently Playing Me Against the Music By Britney Spears, Madonna see related |
everything just simply doesn't go in my way.. everything's out of control.
my emotion is out of control, my skin's out of control, my study plan's out of control, my result, my relationship... every fucking thing.
how am i gonna carry on? i know so many big principles, i know what i'm s'posed to do.. simply cuz i know it, i feel like i can't breathe. people keep on demanding, and i demand on myself.
well.. this's fucking bullshit.
2003年11月19日 下午7點48分00秒something quoted from sze mei's site... God...
something quoted from sze mei's site...
God asks no man whether he will accept life.
That is not the choice. One must take it.
The only choice is how.
------ Henry Ward Beecher
i just wanna dedicate it to the friend i met at the bus stop this afternoon... i'm not even sure whether she'll read it.. but i reallie hope she can be happier.
somehow we can't reallie accept where we are, what i am doing, and how i will be, cuz things are just so much out of our expectations... or say, we simply hafn't ever expected we would be like this. yet, apart from digging ourselves into a hole, the fucking hole of sadness and depression, there're still millions of things we can do. ... umm.. i dunno, perhaps i'm always over-optimistic, that's why i always choose to face failures happily, rather than blaming anything, since i can't erase my failures no matter what. i prefer passing through the failures to drowning into them. my confidence is always here with me.. *of cuz, oftenly, i'f excess confid. oppss* i always believe in my ability to accomplish challenges. i don't reallie haf the thought of proving anything to anyone, but to myself. i think this can make my pressure lighter, at least i don't need to answer any stupid expectations.
while nothing's perfect, i believe that nothing's perfectly bad too, ev'ything must haf some good sides. when we're in depression, try to magnify those good sides, eventhough they're so limited, at least we can still see some sunshine in front. being so stressed out can't help, but relax and take your time.