網誌
2004年5月16日 下午4點03分00秒I'm not a concept. I want you to just keep...
I'm not a concept. I want you to just keep that in your head. Too many guys think I'm a concept or I complete them or I'm going to make them alive, but I'm just a fucked-up girl who is looking for my own piece of mind. Don't assign me yours.
think someone has posted it before.. was it jessica my dear?
2004年5月15日 上午5點07分00秒what do you want me to do? what do you...
what do you want me to do? what do you expect me to do?
what am i supposed to do? why don't you do?
you ain't acting any decent.
FUCK YOU.
2004年5月14日 上午2點39分00秒[IMAGE] [IMAGE] my first cakie. lolz~ people...

my first cakie. lolz~
people say 'out of sight, out of mind'.
they always tell you 'let time do its job, you'll eventually be fine'.
you often hear me say these also... not that i think they're true, nor do i expect you to feel better after hearing these, but i got nothing more to say. i can't think of anything more suitable to someone who's already so miserable, even i know, so well, these are all - bullshit.
whether or not you are / you still will be thinking of him, does not depend on his presence. you just keep on and on... thinking, missing, wondering about him. we could never shut down our world of him. either you bump into him from time to time *thanks fate*, or people around simply, (un)intentionally, tell you his stuff. maybe you show interests in knowing about him, maybe you don't, this's not the point, but eventually you will know, even beyond the level you can handle. we destroy ourselves. but we usually love to.
some people are unwilling to let go, they grap their memories so tightly as if these are the air that sustain them. others wish time could eventually cure. they hope the once destructive pain could gone. yet, could it? time flies, feelings gone, so memories gone, pain remains. when there are no more feelings and memories, hatred and pain fill the gap. the shadow's always there.
the worst thing is: feelings may have already disappeared, yet memories are still clearly here. is it only memories? or do i still feel something about it...? even so, can anything ever ever return..?
*[edit]
maybe we should have known each other better
maybe we should have slowed down a bit
maybemaybemaybe
possibilities. a try. failure. and. here comes the return. panic attack.
dizzy and dizzy.
dedicated to all my dear friends..







best facial expression





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2004年5月6日 下午5點13分00秒soem quality chats with elder sister.. re-fig
soem quality chats with elder sister.. re-figured out why i'm dying for architecture. things seem clearer now. waiting for results, if it isn't too bad. so life has been pretty much the same.. movies, shopping, messing around. have been thinking of what the point of life is these days.. to be precise, what the point of my life is. am i gonna have some sorta career, marry someone, have kids.. till i retire and die? so what do i actually own/create/leave behind in my life? what's the real difference when everyone in the end dies but someone richer and others poorer now or in the foreseeable future? how should i carry on my life..? to plan and count starting from now on? or to exhaust every happiness i can have in the moment? damn.. i know that's kinda bullshit. but i'm just.. thinking. maybe i've too much time to kill, or maybe human beings are real tiny, we can only give the best of every single second... till the destiny reveals....?
anyhoo.. i know all you folks are having exams right now, either a-level, final term, gce.... good luck and peace~
2004年5月2日 上午8點51分00秒all you girls out there.. you gotta be so so...
all you girls out there.. you gotta be so so so jealous, i met daniel wu today!!! haha =P agaiN!!!! and i talked to him.. in addition, i met his doggie too. he's so freaking cocky, but.. handsome and cool. **feeling at easeeeeeee...*
(okay.. fying, i met your requirement, i talked about it already..)
got some pretty good chats with people around.. close or not very close friends. chats in depth, and chats which are juz for fun. all mean something to me, and i truly believe all these brighten up my day. life seems greater after exams, but i haf never forgot those kind, supportive hands a month ago. those form7 people... janice, eugenie, christopher, lam man chiu, cheng suet nga (and those not named).. reallie - big thank you. i'f been postponing this thank you note for days........ and i know u guys hafn't finished the thing yet... but.... hang in there! only a few more days to go.
of cuz i can't leave out all my supportive and caring dear ex-3d gang.. plus my old spcc mates (yeaah you know i'm talking about you). halloween, kathy, miu, edith, $12000... upper 6 arts pepz.. and jessica, 5-year-old mouse and his brother adam, aly, ronald, simon.. simply everyone.
so.. life's pretty fine these days.. watched lots of movies.. shirla's back,, she's now as happy as ever. amen.

